Oops, I did it again!

I'm a touch crazy, a little schizo...
Again...
I changed blog providers. Sorry everybody. It was just too much of a pain in the butt to have to log out of my regular google mail account every time I created a blog or anything. A Pain! In! The! Butt!

So I've converted to wordpress. (It's a little less user friendly, but I'll figure it all out.) Check me out at www.WannaBeAmy.wordpress.com

I'm participating in a really fun summer challenge that should help motivate and move me! It's all chronicled over there. :-D

Weekend Warrior Update

I feel like I had a successful weekend.

My Goals:
Goal 1 – No sodas… Drink Water and Coffee
SUCCESS.
Goal 2 – Run or work out both days… at least 30 minutes.
SUCCESS. :-) Bikesd on Saturday, Pool on Sunday.
Goal 3 – No Fried Foods! This means no ChickFilA Waffle Fries!
SUCCESS!
This one is major because the kiddo was trying to share her french fries with me on Saturday. I stayed strong! Checkout the followup!

Thanks for the motivation!
As well as these healthy choices this weekend, I completed and turned in the major project for one of my classes. It seems like it's all downhill from here. I am SO looking forward to a relaxing summer. Hopefully I can recharge to be ready to go it again in the fall. :-D

I must say that I've been feeling pretty blah the last few days. I'm hoping that it's the stress of the end of the semester. There are other things going on at our house of which I have no control... so that may have something to do with it as well. Hopefully that will have some resolution as well. Sooner than later!?

I love competition!

The College where my employer rents a couple of buildings (our offices) is hosting a Biggest Loser Competition this summer. They've asked us to participate. This is the kind of thing that really motivates me!

So... May 11 through August 16th, I will be participating.

I am truly looking forward to it!

May 1-2 Weekend Warrior!!!! Braveheart Edition

My Goals for the Weekend!
Goal 1 – No sodas… Drink Water and Coffee
Goal 2 – Run or work out both days… at least 30 minutes.
Goal 3 – No Fried Foods! This means no ChickFilA Waffle Fries!


Check out the Weekend Warriors Challenge!

Horrible of me?

I had a conversation with my ex-husband before the kiddo's swim lessons last night. He told me that after Mother's Day, he probably won't continue going to our church... and will start visiting other churches.

Brief Glimpse into my Thoughts:
- Kiddo will only get to go to church with me every other week. (Disappointing)

- I will never have to see his girlfriend again and rarely him. (Elation)

- Will he let me take the kiddo to my church while he is "searching"? (decide to ask)

- Is he ACTUALLY going to find a church? I doubt it. (pondering the future)


History... we've gone to this church since before the kiddo was born. When we separated, our pastor warned us how difficult it would be for us to continue attending the same church. It really wasn't a big deal, until he (the ex) moved his girlfriend here from North Carolina and into his house... and dragged her (who has never really gone to church) to church with him. Now it is a big deal... for me... and apparently for her.

Knowing him, I see sleeping in and skipping church in their future. While I should care, I don't (or maybe it's healthy)... and I honestly hope that is the case... because as long as they continue "visiting" churches, he's willing to let the kiddo continue to come to church with me. He knows it's a great church... and readily admits that the reason they're looking is because his girlfriend isn't comfortable.

In other thoughts:
I hate (no... no!) strongly dislike anonymity. I want some people (see above) to stay oblivious to this blog and I'm a little paranoid that that won't happen. Not much I can do though! Any suggestions?

Sneak Peak & Other Thoughts

I have a little picture that was taken with my cell phone to capture the moment. It hints at the results of the closet clean out.


The bins to the right are winter clothes and boots that I have put away. There's obviously enough space that she has a little cubby to hide away in! She was sliding the door open and closed, acting like she was getting away from it all. She also has one of her baby dolls put to bed in there with her.
I do have better pictures of the closet that are on my digital camera. I'll download them soon. I did end up giving away 3 bags of clothes. :-D

Thoughts on the weight gain:
My coworkers brought to my attention (through conversation) that I haven't taken my thyroid medication since February. That was one of those proverbial "slap to the head". Oops. What was I thinking! So hopefully, with beginning the medication again over the weekend and being more careful about what I eat, and the running, I can drop it back off.

I also am hoping that I haven't really messed up. Fact is that I have a "goiter" or a mass that has grown on my thyroid. Since I've been taking the thyroid medication, it hasn't grown. The doctor says I can have it removed, but if it's not growing, I don't have to have it removed. So... I'm hoping the lack of medication hasn't messed with the status of that. I'd hate to have to have surgery on my neck because I got lazy about taking a simple daily medication.

Thoughts on MOM GUILT:
Why do we do it to ourselves? I got a text message from the ex last night asking "Do you want to pick Jules up from school tomorrow?"
I had JUST made plans to go to the gym immediately after work.
Background: Tuesday is normally one of my days to have the girl, but because her dad has to go on a short business trip on Thursday (his day), we swapped.

Immediate thoughts:
- wondering if I'd be short changing her by not spending 20 minutes in the car with her on a Tuesday evening before her swim lessons... or if it would be that big of a deal if I had him go ahead and pick her up.
- Does he need me to pick her up? Can he do it?
- Is he just being lazy and doesn't want to drive to the daycare when swimming is back toward his work?
- Does he think he's being nice by offering to let me pick her up and giving me that 20 minutes in the car with her since it's my regular night and she's been with him since Sunday afternoon?
- Am I a bad mom if I choose to go to the gym instead of the 20 minutes with her in the car?

So... I decided that it probably wasn't a big deal. I texted him asking if he NEEDED me to pick her up. No... he was just trying to be nice, he can get it.

So I'm going to the gym tonight. Then to watch her swim lessons.
WHY DO I MAKE THESE THINGS INTO SUCH A BIG DEAL???

The moment of truth

and it is not pretty.

I finally stepped on the scale this morning after a couple of months.

Ugh.

I haven't been honest with myself about how much I've put in my mouth...

Or the quality of what has gone in my mouth.

So... even though

I don't WANT to put the number on here...

here it is...

195

Ugh... up another 10 pounds.

10 pounds away from my highest ever.

Well, knowledge is power right. So I change today. Back to counting calories and eating as clean as possible. No more fries on the side. More water, less tea. Less frufru coffee and back to the basics.

I think I'll make a trip to the farmers market this weekend.

If I lose 2 pounds a week, I might can lose 10 by Memorial day...
So that'll be my first goal! I'm going to be sharing on here again! Thanks ahead of time for the support!